Saturday, October 26, 2013

My mother, the enabler

I called my mother this evening from My Favorite Big Box Store. I had gone for one item, but it wasn't there, so I consoled myself by trolling the cross stitch book aisle. I've been designing a cross stitch sampler in my head, and looking into alphabet books, small item patterns and the like.

It's a sickness, a very, very special sickness.

I found one and was browsing the others to make sure it was really the one I wanted, when a woman approached me for help in matters yarnish. I assisted her with finding a yarn to go with her beginner's crochet hook and book, then started browsing the yarn myself. As I have more yarn than Big Box Store does, thank you, Yarnia, you'd think I wouldn't find anything worth buying, would you? And you'd be wrong. Wrongitty-wrong-wrong, as it turns out.

I went down the Lion Brand aisle. BIG mistake! I saw their Hometown USA yarns. They had a team colors version in Da Phew's school colors -- and a general home town version in the 'accent' color. All bulky yarns. Shockingly soft, for Lion Brand. I'm so super pleased that the major yarn companies seem to have gotten the memo that knitters, crocheters and other yarn fanciers prefer their acrylic soft, but sheesh. Makes impulse buying just too easy.

So to control myself I whip out my cell phone and call my mother. I say, "Either I don't need any more yarn, or you need a scarf in Phew's school colors." The lady next to me snorted in laughter, and I end up walking out with this:

Because I need more yarn.

Sigh. I guess I should just accept that I'll always be easily seduced by spun fiber, but it's aggravating. I mean, where will I keep this stuff until it's knitted up and Mom is wearing it? I have no earthly idea.

And the whole thing is compounded by the fact that earlier today I impulse shopped this little gem:


I guess the army wives stuck in Berlin during the blockade got bored and decided to cheer themselves by writing a cookbook based on the trouble you can get up to with limited 'vittles'. It's got a recipe for making cottage cheese out of powdered milk. And a soup made out of cream of wheat.

Oh, there's normal stuff in there (creamed spinach, various sausage dishes, Toad in the Hole, etc.), and a punch for a party that made me realize that while they didn't have fresh milk, they totally had the contents of sixty liquor stores hidden in their basements. It calls for 20 bottles of wine and cognac. YeBobs. I'd think you'd get high off the fumes, never mind drinking the thing!

It's perfect bound, which means that even though I was the first person to turn the pages, and that about six hours ago, they're already falling out. I will have to make a trip to my local FedEx/Kinkos and avail myself of their spiral binding services again.

I do that with all my softcover cookbooks, actually. I got in the habit with my piano music books, and realized it would make using those cookbooks so much easier. They lay flat on the counter! You don't have to worry overmuch about losing pages! It's a wonder, and no mistake.

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