Apparently, they are the hemorrhoids on the backside of my car's transmission. Once Fred's nurse* replaces one or the other (whichever one is malfunctioning), he's going to be back up and on all four wheels again.
I hope and pray they are right! Even if the expensive solenoid ($250) is the one that's malfunctioning instead of the cheaper one ($70), that's way, way, way the heck better than a new transmission ($4000). Way. I can actually pay to have that replaced. Unlike the whole transmission.
My brother wanted to know why I'm so paranoid about my transmission going out. I replied, Because I haven't got the money to repair it. And he conceded that that is when they do, indeed, go out.
Because, seriously, have you ever heard anyone say, Oh, it's just the transmission, a minor fix and I'll be back on the road! or Good thing I had that spare five large lying around; getting my transmission repaired was a pain, but I could deal in cash! ?
No, I haven't, either.
*Our tame auto mechanic, Fred's nurse practitioner, is actually a nurse. He used to do auto repair on his days off, but found it far more profitable than nursing -- and his patients less a pain in the patuckus. Can't say as I blame him, I know Fred is very stoic when he gets injured, can't say the same for myself.