Friday, December 26, 2008

Reasons why I need to move out even though it scares me to do so

1. My place, my television, my remote. Which means that if I feel like it, I can turn the (*$@)&#@$#&#@^@# thing off. Whenever I want. Not tonight--it's Dirty Jobs marathon on Discovery Channel. Mike Rowe. Yum. I will have to sell plasma so I can keep basic cable/satellite.

2. The dog and I can Without the nagging, the anxiety over what/how we're doing, if we're going for a walk, what we're eating...just. Be.

3. No more assumptions that, whatever I may be doing at the time, be it making my own dinner, feeding the dog, cleaning up vomit or neurosurgery, I should just drop it so I can pick up a piece of paper someone else doesn't want to bend down for.

4. Uninterrupted knitting time in the evenings. Or reading. Or watching Mike Rowe wade through a lot of water in a tight pair of jeans and wet t-shirt. Whatever. Reference number 3 above to see why my knitting and reading time would somehow be interrupted. Sheesh.

5. Thermostat control (or at least the option of keeping a space heater right in front of my chair.)

I don't know how I'm going to do it, but I really have no choice at this point. And if I don't grow up and take responsibility for myself now, when the hell do I think I'm going to do it? I hope there's room in the budget for satellite. It's only $20 a month, although if I bundle my phone and internet with the cable, all three can be as low as $65..... Yeah. I think I can do it.

Anyway, I've got a serious case of Startitis right now. I started my music theory scarf, lost interest. I started up again on the lace project that is no longer Christmas knitting but now birthday knitting, screwed up one row from the end of my second repeat and have to frog back. Damn. Now I'm thinking of starting up on my alpaca scarf again. I've decided to frog the lace I've got (although I like the pattern I came up with and will use it again) and go with a daisy stitch pattern. AND I want to start up with my Malabrigo in the Mariposa colorway.

So much to do, so much to do....

I'd better go eat something. I've been off my feed (the holidays do take it out of me), and maybe read some of my book. Tomorrow I will do my daisy scarf with the alpaca. I hope it'll be nice and drapey if I use slightly larger needles than I'd started with before.

Sigh. And then I hope I keep up with it until I get over myself, frog that darn lace scarf back to the fifth repeat (I had almost finished the seventh before I magically lost a stitch) and start back up again. You only lose when you quit, but right now I'm sulking. Hey, if you admit it, it's not all that bad!

Hope you had a merry Christmas. Aside from my Startitis, I did.

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